Take your boyfriend to work day

Last week I endured "take your sons and daughters to work day". It was cute. The kids looked bored. Nowadays instead of just hanging out with Mom and getting taken to lunch, there are assemblies and programs. Enough to make the kids wish they were in school. Maybe that is the idea.

For next year, I propose replacing that with "take your boyfriend to work day".

In this program, women's boyfriends would get to go to work with their lady friends. It would be a good opportunity for boyfriends to find out what the work environment is like, how to dress, how to take a coffee break. So many men are falling behind their lady friends in their career paths that it might be a good instructional day for young men. It also might be a good experience for the boyfriends to get to know what shaving and taking a bath at 8am is like.

When women talk about their boyfriends at work, sometimes it might be nice to associate a face with a story. Now the co-workers would get to see what said boyfriends are like. Perhaps determine if they are appropriate partners for their girlfriends.

William and Kate

Like most Americans, I'm fascinated by the British Royal Family. Meeting a friend in Britain I asked her about the Royal Family and she said, "Oh that's something we do to attract American tourists. Here we don't really follow the queen and all that rot". Americans every year put millions into the coffers of our British friends visiting sights involving the House of Windsor or Stuart.

And it's true, on trips to England I've seen Buckingham Palace and the Tower of London, where Mary Queen of Scott got hanged. The tour of the Tower of London was a high point of my trip that year, where a witty Beefeater led a tour and we got to see where Mary Queen of Scotts got her all.

In America, when you enter a city you might see a sign with the population of the place and, out west, the elevation of the town. In Britain you are likely to see a sign that says, "Here Lord Souchmouch was hanged in 1566". Britain is full of morbid history. Royals got that way with shootings and hangings, not by photo shoots in People Magazine.

And so we are being inundated this week with the upcoming wedding. It's a shame William and Kate are so dull. Harry would have made a more exciting groom. Only the most dedicated Royal watchers will not get bored this week with the fuldorol surrounding the Royal wedding. For a week we will take our eyes off of the economy and Qaddafi and be glued to the tube while buying overpriced tea cups to celebrate the event. I have an egg cup from George's coronation of 1937. I'm waiting for it go go up in value.

Hero sandwiches

I don't know if it's still true but in the 70's there was a rule that upon graduating from college you had to drive to California to find your identity. I obeyed the law and drove the Ford Falcon to California with "Crazy Bob". The first place we stopped was Charleston, West Virginia. My friend was convinced that the dance came from there. Many years later I realized the famous Charleston was in South Carolina.

I remember being impressed by the fact that there was a commercial AM station nearby that played bluegrass music. We went to a sub stand.

Today, returning to Charleston WV after all these years I went to lunch and ended up going to a sub shop and having a hero sandwich. They still put mayo on ham sandwiches.

The page 69 test

The page 69 test

Recently I read about the page 69 test. The theory is that if you open a book and like page 69, you'll probably like the book. It's sort of like the flip side theory. I developed this theory as a teenager. In this theory, I posited that if you like the flip side of a hit single, you'll probably like the album. It shows the group has depth. It's like meeting someone at work. At work you see the person's page 69 not just the hit single.

Give it the old college try

Many of us try and fail at endeavors. Failed musicians, politicians, Lothario's give up and take on more prosaic endeavors. With Libya, America will probably give up in a few weeks but we will always be able to say, "We gave it the old college try".

Editor's note:

Recently finished reading A Walk in the Woods by Bill Bryson. In this entertaining book on walking the Appalachian trial, the author and his buddy twice give up on hiking the AT. But at least they gave it the old college try.