Monday, September 26, 2016

Ellie and Hillary run for office


Recently I was watching the Andy Griffith episode where Ellie Walker runs for office and gets the women and men in Mayberry all asunder. Made me think of today and the upcoming Presidential election. Here you have the archetypal man versus the archetypal woman in a contest. Or to put it another way,  it's an interesting contest because it pits the type of woman men can't stand with the type of man that annoys  the women folk. 

Hillary is the assistant manager at work who writes in your review that you keep a messy desk. She is the school teacher who gives your son a C in algebra, which keeps him from playing sports. She is the sister-in law that doesn't allow smoking in the house and then hits you up for a contribution to the church charity. 

Trump is the loud mouthed guy at the bar who explains why a player should stand up for the National Anthem if he wants to play football. He is the guy who shows up at the party with a date the same age as his daughter while his wife is staying at home. He's the bragadocio who can fix everybody's problems but never pays the waiter a tip. 

So there you have it, a man that women don't like and a woman that annoys most men, certainly those over forty, who remember when women at work brought in the coffee and wives did the laundry.  Wonder if Ellie won that election.  

Saturday, September 10, 2016

Buying a t shirt for your grand neice



This is (trigger warning) a somewhat sexist appraisal of how to handle extended family purchasing situations.

The wrong way to buy a gift for your niece.
You are at the gift shop at Valley Forge and want to buy a cute t shirt for your grand niece. You buy it on impulse. Inevitably, the grand niece will never wear her t shirt. The size is wrong. She doesn't like the design. Anyway, she already has five hundred t shirts and on birthdays and holidays she always gets a few dozen more. The truth is your grand niece only shops at fancy schmanzy children's boutiques with designer names and prices. You have made a mistake. Your t shirt will be sold at next year's church rummage sale.

The correct way to buy a gift for a grandniece. Your wife calls your nephew's wife and they have a nice chat. Your wife tells you what she wants, she buys it, and you sign your name on it. Or, if you don't have a wife, you can buy her a cash card at Amazon.