Mother's day

We all know the drill for Mother's Day. You have to get to your Mother's house with a gift. Then you are fed a fattening meal and go home with leftovers. If you are upper middle class, you and your siblings and spouses take your mother to a restaurant where you eat an overpriced and fattening meal. If you are lucky, you may walk out with a doggy bag.

If you mother is in the grave you are supposed to visit it, put flowers on it, and stroll about and complain about the maintenance. "You'd think they could get rid of all these weeds!" you say. Later, you go to a relative's house for dinner. If your significant other has kids you may be allowed to attend Mother's Day there, however if you show up you have to bring a gift.

I realize how lucky I am. I can sit around the house all day long on Sunday in my underwear. I can drink beer, watch the game, and don't even have to shave. Needless to say no gifts.

This year, for the first time in ten years I bought someone a Mother's Day card. I realized that for the first time in ten years I did something for Mother's Day. Who knows, one day I might even have to take a shower on that day again. To all the mother's out there, "Happy mother's day!"