Thursday, November 6, 2014

The five stages of life

The first stage of life: Infancy and childhood

The second stage of life: Adolescence: This stage begins when you sneak your first cigarette in the woods

The third stage of life: Young Adulthood: This stage begins with your first job and your first apartment. These are  the fun years.

The fourth stage of life: Adulthood: After you sign your divorce papers and start paying child support you are now a mature man

The fifth stage of life: Old age: This begins the first time you walk through the doors of the cardiologist. Above the door is the quotation from Dante's Inferno. "Abandon all hope ye who enter here". "Golly", you laugh,"everybody looks so old". Soon come the EKG, the echo cardiogram, the stress test, the double heart bypass surgery, the triple heart bypass surgery, the stent. Then you are sitting in a nursing home breathing out of an oxygen mask. Then they cart you off to a cemetery. 

The five stages of life. 


  1. A good writer can find humor anywhere, even at the cardiologist.