Miss America

Yes, Sunday night, Miss America is back in dear old Atlantic City. I have many memories of watching this show on the old Philco as a kid. The different competitions were fascinating. We all had our favorites. My mother was always loyal to the girls from the South. "You know, Southern girls are prettier than those Northern girls."  The judges must have agreed with her.

I still remember the commercials where you got to see the contestants putting on Noxzema cold cream as they prepared. And at the end, the whole family would bawl as the lucky girl walked down the aisle with Bert Parr singing that same old song. It was one of the few times I saw my father cry. 

Now the major story is that one of the contestants has a tattoo. I know the younger generation love their tattoos. Mother would not have approved.  

Smokers tend not to be church goers

http://www.gallup.com/poll/163856/strong-link-church-attendance-smoking.aspx


Perhaps the answer is to allow people to smoke in church.

So what is it with Linconlin?

A few years ago I got an email and was asked to join Linkedin. I was flattered, thinking that now I was being invited to join an in group. Parties at the Hamptons, gallery openings in Dumbo, dinners on Nassau Street soon would be coming my way. I was in Linkedin. 

Well, not surprisingly, none of that happened. Today, however,  I get almost daily updates from friends, former co-workers, people I met once at long ago library conferences. They endorse me for my many skills. Sometimes I wonder how they know I'm any good at what I do. One conversation over a danish in 1994 and they can definitely say I am excellent at collection development.

I also get important information. John Belosconi is now connected to Shirley Winkowski, the marketing manager of a small firm in Austin. So. What do I care? Perhaps old John is having an extra marital affair. Maybe that's what brings him to Austin.

I get it!  people are active in Linkedin because they are job hunting. Perhaps they want me to endorse them on their many skills. I was meandering around Linkedin yesterday and was presented with photographs of friends, old girl friends, a former boss, someone I met at a meeting (I think I thought she was cute). Is such and such knowledgeable in Wordpress? Is such and such an expert in data marketing analysis? 

It must be easy to find help nowadays. You just look up the candidates Linkedin account and find out what skills they possess and immediately hire the person with the most endorsements.

Family gossip

Q

When our mothers leave us they leave with a trove of family stories and gossip.  They also make it hard to follow the trials and tribulations of one's extended family. While your mother is alive and able to use the telephone, male relatives are able to keep up with things through their mothers.

• Your cousin is getting a divorce. Your cousin tells his mother. His mother tells your mother and she tells you. 
• Your cousin got a DWI. Your cousin tells his mother. His mother tells your mother and she tells you.
• Your niece dropped out of Bucknell. She tells her mother. Your sister-in law tells your mother and she tells you. 
• Your cousin lost his job. He had to borrow money from your uncle. Your uncle told your aunt, she told your mother and your mother told you. 

One good thing about family gossip is that it often shows your parents how lucky they are to have you rather than the flotsam and jetsam of the extended family. However it is hard to keep up on things when mother passes away. Of course there's always Facebook. Unfortunately, Facebook posts tend to dwell on accomplishments, cute pictures of the kids and vacations. A keen eye may note a missing husband from vacation pictures, but mothers are a better source of what your cousins were really up to.

The trials of the lowly flip flop

I seems there has been assault lately on that emblem of summer and good times, the flip flop. Just last week I was getting ready for work. I put on my Hawaii shorts, my monkey t shirt and my flip flops. At work there was a memo on my desk. It read  "Shorts, flip-flops, beach shoes, strapless tops and other clothing are not appropriate for the workplace." It was a huge surprise for me to find this startling announcement. The poor flip flop was no longer the accepted footwear for work.

Flip flops bring back many summer memories. My mother bought them at Modell's and all summer I would wear them everywhere. At college they went on as soon as the snow was off the sidewalk. At work they went on the day after Easter and stayed on until Columbus Day. Now I have to wear regular shoes again. I wonder why they are called flip flops?

I passed two thousand motorcycles

As promised, here is the motorcycle story. I was driving on Route 17 in New York on an uneventful morning  when I say a herd of police cars. They were directing all the traffic to the left lane. On the right lane, there was a parade, two abreast, of motorcycles. They were men, women, young, old, I even saw Santa at one point. I started to pass them and over the next half hour I must have past two thousand motorcycles. At the head of the pack was a state police car, keeping them in line and under the speed limit.

I have no idea who they were or why they were there. I guess motorcycles like to travel in packs. Must be fun.

Baby registries

There are two worlds that a man is likely to encounter in life. There is the dark bizarre world of bachelorhood. A world of dank bars, movie houses, travel, museums, bachelorettes and take-out Chinese food. Then there is the main stream world of marriage, kids, family and two story colonials. Work is one of those places where these two worlds intersect.

So that is why I am browsing the Baby's R Us baby registry of a co-worker who has a cake in the oven. I guess there was the off chance that the $25 for the baby shower/luncheon/gift was insufficient to show one's affection for lady x so the memo also included a link to her baby registry. Her boss is also expecting, as much as a man can be expecting, and his baby registry is also featured. Personally I think it's un-manly to distribute a man's baby registry at work but that is a theme for another day.

The baby registry is fascinating. Until yesterday I never knew such things existed. Now I get to experience first hand the pleasures of birth, albeit vicariously. How neet! A giraffe teether! A daisy decorated changing table! Baby bouncers! Who knew such things existed! Well, time to put the dim sum in the microwave.