Predictions 2020 on Dec 31, 2019

This is my tenth anniversary predictions blog. It was a good year for a lot of things but not for my prognostications. In general, I was too pessimistic. I said the Eagles would not be in the hunt, and as of now they are very much in the hunt, even in the playoffs. Interest rates are lower today than a year ago, contrary to my prediction. I predicted Mike Pence would be our president at the end of this year, also wrong. Trade sanctions with China appear to be diminishing, which I did predict. Last year I predicted Microsoft would be selling at 120, much below the end of year high of 158.

 Entity:              Dec 31, 2018:      Dec 31, 2019:

                                                     as I predicted.
Dow Jones               23327               26000
S and P                      2507                2900
NAS                          6635                7000
Oil                              45.81              70
Unemployed              4.1%               4.5%
Microsoft                  101.57             120

 Entity:                Today:              Dec 31, 2020:

Dow Jones               28538             30000
S and P                        3231                3500
NAS                            8973                9100
Oil                              61.21                70
Unemployed             3.5%             4.5%
Microsoft                  157.7                 170

For the end of 2020 I see Joseph Biden as the president elect. The Eagles will have a wild car slot. The new decade will be up and down on stocks. It will end with a slight gain. Brexit will finally happen and add tariffs to British trade transactions and lead to a slight contraction in their economy.  Global warming will get worse but the USA will begin a slow return to normalcy. Happy New Years.

Why does Santa ride on a fire truck?

One tradition that we have in America that they don't have anywhere else in the world is that of a fire truck roaring through the neighborhood with Santa. It is a tradition unique to our country. If you were to ask me what I like best about the Christmas season, it is the fire trucks screaming through the condos and the waving of Santa. Why this became a tradition I do not know.  It is one of the mysteries of life along with why Andrew Yang is in the presidential debates. 

I now have an Echo

Occasionally, I list the things that a successful baby boomer should have in his possession. The last time I wrote on this topic I announced that I was catching up with my peers, I even had a Roomba, albeit an old one,  but still lacked the latest thing, an Echo.

Like a lot of my peers I viewed Alexa as creepy and something that I certainly did not need. Recently though, I have been doing chores in the kitchen and wished I could listen to pod casts while cooking or washing clothes,  as well as  have access to more radio stations than my vintage clock radio provided.

Last week I got a birthday present from a distant relative, and what should it contain but, an Echo!👲 I am now up to date (I still don't have an ex wife and a daughter with a summer place but you can't have everything). I now have a friend I can talk to who lives in my kitchen.

To be honest, at sixty dollars, it is a bargain. I understand it is a loss leader to sell more products, but even if you just use the free stuff it is useful. I can now say, "Alexa, play the Slate political gabfest" and it will. I can ask to play a radio station and it does. I can set a time alarm, find the weather, get a new Spanish word for the day, hear the Dow average, and get a recipe for Mince pie. It doesn't have a large music library unless you pay extra, but if you have ordered music from Amazon over the years it will play songs from those purchases.

I have to admit it feels creepy talking to the thing, a man alone in the kitchen talking to his new friend. I guess I can say it added a new skill to my resume. Supervising an artificial  friend.

Editor's note: No I don't have Spotify  but that is permissible for a baby boomer, if not for someone under 50.

Is it by Churchill or will I have to sell my uncles farm in Normandy?

Netscape has a tendency to thrust on us unfunny comedy specials, silly millennial sitcoms and schmaltzy Christmas specials.  Still, by searching through the caverns of its fare, one can occasionally find an obscure show that is good for a few laughs.

My latest find is the very British "Fake or Fortune". It shows how a painting's provenance is analyzed using high technology, talking to families associated with the history of the work, and listening to the opinions of art specialists. The specialists criticized one Churchill work by noting that the Prime Minister sucked at drawing people and that the  people in the painting in question are too well executed.

The thing I like most about the show is when they interview people who have some connection to the work. Here we are given a rare look at the gentry of England with their posh accents,  living in genteel poverty in grand castles with bad plumbing.

Fiona will ask Philip "Oh dear perhaps if we could meet the daughter of the Earl of Thwickham they could tell us if the painting was in their uncle's will." Then we go to a beautiful room with chandeliers and Chippendales (but I suspect poor wireless) and get to meet  a dear eighty year old woman who sadly tells us that the wills were destroyed in the fire of 1949.

In an attempt to add drama to the story, our hearts are usually tugged at by the news that if the painting is real the owners will be able to salvage the horse farm in Sussex or bring the castle up to code. We are made to really feel for old moneyed Britishers whose lives will be so much better if only they can prove that the Monet in their possession is the real McCoy.

Editor's note: Sorry for all the Netflix reviews. I need to get out more. Now they are trying to get me to watch a Christmas show in German with subtitles. Fake or Fortune is also on YouTube.

How America ruined England

I've been happily advancing through season 3 of the Crown. Like most Americans, I find the trials of tribulations of Britain to be entertaining and satisfying, perhaps even more than our tawdry history here in the colonies. Sadly if unintentionally, many of the problems that appear in the Crown can be traced to America. Episode after episode shows how the glory that was Britannia has been laid low by the influence of those ruffians across the Atlantic.

Wallis Simpson, an American, is the first person to try to take the Royals away from their mission by stealing their future king. Then the Americans had to come in and win the war against the Nazi's, much to olde Winston's chagrin. Then, hat in hand, they had to beg America for money and used dear Lady Margaret to lure it out of the hands of that awful American president from Texas.

Prince Philip gave an embarrassing interview on the American TV show, Meet the Press, and caused much consternation at Buckingham Palace. Harold Wilson happily is shown destroying the small town commerce of Britain by opening an American style supermarket.

Today, beyond the scope of the Crown, the indignities continue. We have an American TV star married to a prince. We have dear Prince Andrew brought down by an American businessman and purveyor of underage delicacies. If only the Americans had kept their rock and roll, Walmarts, and other corrupting  influences on their side of the Atlantic, Britain would be much happier than it is today.

Quid Pro Quo

If there is one good thing that has come out of the Impeachment hearings, it's that all of us now know what "Quid Pro Quo" means. I'm waiting for someone to name a bar after the term, perhaps in a place frequented by lawyers.

Truthfully, we all live by quid pro quo everyday. We get something we want in return for something we reluctantly give. Our parents want us to go to Aunt Clara and Uncle Ben's 50th wedding anniversary. We see how we can use this to our advantage and the next thing you know we have borrowed the boat for the weekend.

Our son is complaining about needing a new pair of sneakers. We get him to agree to go to Aunt Bertha's house for her birthday. The son gets his sneakers and Aunt Bertha gets to see her favourite nephew. Quid pro Quo.

Our boss wants us to go to a meeting. We don't want to go. Our boss lets us take the day after Thanksgiving off. We go to the meeting. Quid pro Quo.

Unfulfilled quid pro quo can get a bit murky. Is it quid pro quo if the kid gets the sneakers and then gets a cold on the birthday of dear Aunt Bertha?  Our girlfriend wants  us to visit her parents, we go, but that night  she cuts off our sexual advances. That is thwarted quid pro quo. Sine qua non? 

California and the American dream

Northern California, as well as the Los Angeles area are experiencing the twin disasters of fire and power outages. They say that things always happen first in California and it looks like the damage from climate warming are coming there first.

Among my friends at college, the general view of where to move after college was decidedly in favor of California, or at least, the west. "F--k New Jersey" they all said. "I'm getting out of here to where the chicks are good looking and the air is clean. California is where I'm heading." Moving to Califiornia has always been the American dream.  I know there's an old expression, be careful of what you wish for.

Shameless

I know I'm eight years behind, but I've just finished season 1 of Shameless am quite impressed. It's a show about the real America as lived by a family of con artists in a snow filled Chicago. The leader of the clan, Frank Gallagher, is living the American dream of having family members work for him while he hangs out in bars and collects disability insurance.

What a great show. I'm sure it goes downhill from the first season but I am having a swell time. Here's a sociologist interpretation of the show. Now on Netflix.

The $1500 frozen pizza

It was a rainy afternoon and I had been driving all day and I felt like a beer. I drove into a friendly looking bar and ordered a brew. Next to me was an older man with a golf hat on and a smile to his face. He looked at me and said, "The last frozen pizza I made cost me $1500."

I suspected I was about to hear a story. I turned off my cellphone, sipped my beer and said, "Really, how did that come to be?"

"I was a chilly night and I was too lazy to cook. Instead I took a frozen pizza out of the fridge and put it in the oven. My oven only has a top burner because the bottom one is broke. I turned it on and to my surprise, for the first time in years both burners worked and the oven got nice and toasty.

" After ten minutes I could smell the pizza but I hear a sort of sizzling sound. I opened the oven and it was full of black smoke. The pizza was done but apparently, so was the oven.

"I went to PC Richards and picked out a Samsung oven that would match my TV and cell phone. The lady said, "we'll install the oven if it has a plug.

" My set up is the old fashioned kind that has a wire going from the oven to the wall.

"Sorry, but you need a 40 amp plug. Call an electrician and have him put in a wall plug and I'll order the oven.

"The electrician came and said he could install a plug on the back wall but only if I got rid of the old oven first, since he needed the area to work. I went onto Nextdoor and found a guy who hauled old electronic equipment. He was an organic farmer and hauled stuff with his son and truck for extra income. He was late coming over because his pet turtle escaped and he had to find him.

"The electrician came back and put in the new wall plug, but let it loose against the wall. When the PC Richards guy came he drove a hole in the wall and put the plug there, giving me an extra two inches of space so the oven could go flush against the wall.

"Finally I had a new oven with timer gizmos, a convection oven, a warming tray and other stuff I don't know how to use. The oven heated up the place so much I needed to turn on the air conditioner. That's when I noticed the air conditioner didn't work.

"I changed the battery in the thermostat but I still got no results when I turned on the fan, the air or the heat. Finally I called the air conditioning guy."

My new friend sipped his beer and the bartender winked at me. "He's been telling that story all week. Anyway I make better pizza here than he can make at home."

"Anyhow" the storyteller continued, "the air conditioning guys checked the thermostat and found out  it wasn't  getting any power. They checked the air handler and found out it wasn't getting any power either. They monkeyed around with my fuse box. Finally there was an a - ha moment. The switch in the air handler was frozen. Apparently when I first shorted out the oven, it blew the fuse in the air handler and burned the switch.

"The air conditioning guys charged me two hundred and fifty dollars for the service call." The cost of that, the hauler, the electrician and the oven cost me fifteen hundred dollars."

"So, after all that, how was the pizza?" I asked.

"I over cooked it. I guess I got to get used to the new oven."

I finished my beer and got ready to leave. By now the bar was filling up and so was the highway.

Editor's note: Now that I reconciled my checking account I see that they only charged me $150 for fixing the air handler.

Los Angeles as shown on Netflix

Recently I've been alternating between two Netflix shows, Flaked, set in Venice, and the Girls Guide to Divorce, set in the swankier parts of LA. Both shows have lots of exterior shots of Los Angeles, and serve as a travelogue. 

Girls guide is entertaining and shows how upper crust 30-40 somethings navigate divorce and love while living in gorgeous digs and dressing well. The characters have difficult children and exes and problematic boyfriends. In this show average looking, not so youngish women are shown to be attractive to good looking young men. Perhaps this fantasy is presented to attract women viewers. We also get an inside look at the world of television, media and law for these privileged characters. 

Venice has always had a special place in most baby boomers hearts for its hipness and at the same time being a little rough around the edges. This show, like Tales of the City, shows what happens when aging hipsters confront the high rents as their neighborhoods gentrify. This is a likeable show, and makes you want to spend a week in Venice, just to soak up the ambience. The male female equation is reversed here, with good looking women being attracted to less than remarkable guys. Guess they are looking for a more male oriented demographic. 

Both shows have some hard to believe plot twists. Love the bicycle built for two in Flaked. 

Impossible whopper

Apparently hipsters have been given permission to go to a fast food restaurant. It is now okay to go to Burger King to order an impossible whopper. It was even recommended on a Slate podcast.

Having gout, I thought it might be fun to eat a burger without having to worry about uric acid or triglycerides so I tried one.

First thing I discovered is that they are expensive. A small meal with cheese came to over ten dollars, almost four dollars more than a regular Whopper with cheese meal. They do look like a regular Whopper, though.

The taste is actually okay. Definitely better than any Morningstar product I have ever tried. If you were in a bar and had just consumed four beers and few shots and were handed one you probably would wolf it down and think you were eating a real hamburger.

On close inspection it doesn't taste exactly like a hamburger, although I can't exactly say why. I also noticed a slight taste of peanut butter lingered after the meal. Still if you were in a motor court on a highway and were tired of lackluster chicken sandwiches, it might be a nice alternative.

Cheddar

I noticed a new channel on my cable this week, Cheddar. It came out of Buzz Feed and was recently purchased by Altice, which owns Optimum Cable. I guess that's why I'm seeing it on my Optimum service. It is also on YouTube.

What is Cheddar? It appears to be a business oriented channel with millennial aged hostesses. The YouTube has mini documentaries on topics like "Why does New York City smell?" Apparently the absence of alleys has a lot to do with it.

Is it worth looking into? I dunno. It looks like it is an attempt to reach a business oriented audience that is youngish, perhaps people who have invested in the market while living in Mom's basement. I will have to watch more of it before I come to a definitive answer.

Bocce

One of the traditions that people of Italian American descent are exposed to is the playing of Bocce. Yesterday I played bocce in Bradley Beach New Jersey, followed by the competitive sport of eating pizza, along the great coastal shore of New Jersey.

Although I usually suck at sports, I can proudly say I was only the second worst player in the group and even got a few lucky moments when I brought honor and points to the "reds". The team name being determined by the color of the ball used.

You'll see bocce, in different forms, being played throughout Europe and in Italian neighborhoods along the East coast of the USA. In America it is traditionally played by old men of Italian origin but it is slowly picking up speed among non Italians in places like Texas. Like pickelball, it is one of those sports where, with perseverance, even someone who sucks at sports can play a decent or at least non embarrassing game.

Editor's note: The white marker ball is the pallino not polenta.

I missed Woodstock

When baby boomers reminisce about their weekend at Woodstock, I have an evil (until now) secret that I have held. Instead of going to Woodstock that weekend I went with my parents to Mo-No-Mo-Nock. Instead of skinny dipping in the rain, I swam in the pool with the bathing suit that Mother picked out for me. Instead of taking acid and listening to the Grateful Dead, I went to the square dance and line danced with the other guests at the hotel.

All the hip kids at school went to Woodstock (if they weren't back packing in Europe) while I was playing golf with my father at Mo-No-Mo-Nock. I was one of the guys at the pool saying, "Woodstock! I would draft the whole lot of them!" While most baby boomers remember Woodstock, I will always remember the weekend at the Pocono's with mother and father Hubbard.

Youtube q and a videos

One of the features of subscribing to You tube channels is that, if you wait long enough, you will come upon a q and a session. These are usually originally done live but are available later in taped form. In general, they are a lazy way for a You tuber to get an easy program in without having to do any location shots, editing, or scripting. They simply answer questions that people send them.

Depending on how you view You tube, you may or may not know the questions they are answering. Typically, the host or hosts look at the screen and answer questions. Typical answers are "No I've never been to Russia". "Yes I plan to going to an In and Out place when I come to the states". "No I hate dogs." "I'm not talking about my former boyfriend!"

Q and A also gives the host/hosts a chance to promote their merchandise and Patreon. Apparently Patreon is a big money maker for You tubers.

Last week I saw an interesting Q and A. The host ate Chinese chicken with chopsticks and answered questions. Politicians could learn a lot from her. Boris Johnson could have a bowl of Thai chicken and eat it with chopsticks while answering questions from Parliament. Might come in handy when we get closer to Brexit.

Oh what in Heaven's name should I do with my Amazon boxes

Lately I have been trying to throw out the old junk that is accumulating in my abode. I have gotten rid of some things but I find I have tons of old Amazon boxes. I have always reasoned that I need them for returns (in reality I have never returned anything from Amazon) or to send gifts to people (because I've gotten in the habit of using Amazon to send gifts to non local people I don't do this very often). The reality is that the boxes accumulate in my closet.

Apparently you can use the boxes to ship stuff to Goodwill industries (with free shipping). They also make good kindling if you need to build a bonfire. I suppose I can recycle them if I remember to dismember the boxes into flat surfaces.

Women's pockets are smaller than mens

Today I learned something that I never knew. That the pockets in women's pants are considerably smaller than the pockets in men's pants. That's why a man can walk somewhere without having to carry a pocket book or back pack. Women can't because the pockets in women's trousers are too small to fit a wallet, cellphone, or even, in some cases, keys.

Now I know why women are always lugging around pocket books. There must be some advantage to this system but I haven't figured out what it is. Perhaps a throwback to the Victorian era?

Teens working less in summer

New reports indicate young people are now less likely to have summer jobs. Apparently they are not just hanging out on the beach, though. They are volunteering, taking summer classes, and backpacking in Europe.

I have many memories of my summer job in high school. That money also paid for pizza, transportation to school, and pot that I used throughout the school year.

I guess it's good and bad. The thing I learned the most about my summer job is the importance of the coffee break.

Air conditioning, revisited

I have a new theory on how globalization affects the United States. You can think of the world as a giant house in summer where the owner can only afford to air condition one room. The rest of the house is hot, humid, and full of mold except for the one room that has an air conditioner. The room with the air conditioner is the developed world. The United States, Canada, western Europe, Australia are relatively comfortable and (until recently) prosperous.
If you open the doors of that room you have the world economy under globalization. The outer reaches of the house get a slight increase in comfort. Most noticeable, however is the one room that had air conditioning. It's conditions deteriorate rapidly.

It's the theory of supply and demand. When there is a limited resource, (water, energy,  air conditioned cool air, diplomas, doctors, teachers, nurses) limiting those people who have access to these resources to the few is better for the few. When college degrees were scarce, people who had such things had a leg up in the job market. After the sixties, when practically everyone had one of those things, they became less valuable. Hence people like me selling hot dogs with a BA degree. Free college for all will only devalue further the degrees for people who already have them. 

The same can be said for doctors and nurses. With health access for all, the doctor's offices will be crammed with people and it will be harder for the people who have health insurance today to get appointments. With an onslaught of immigrants, housing will get even scarcer and teachers will have dozens of new students and they will need to be taught English. This will not benefit the kids who are in these schools now as they will have to compete in more crowded classrooms. Unfortunately, in most places, local taxpayers are not going to want to see their property taxes raised to accommodate other people's children. 

These facts could hurt our Democratic candidates in a general election. One thing I miss about work is now I have to pay for my own air conditioning. 

Editor's note: Expanded from a blog written a few years ago. 

The changing meaning of drop

Recently I've noted that the word "drop" seems to have acquired a new meaning. A meaning at odds with its old meaning. Old:
I dropped a book. Meaning the book fell from my hands and landed on the floor. Old: The publisher dropped his book. Meaning the publisher is removing the book from its catalog, usually because of poor sales. New: I dropped my book today. Meaning I have released my book to an unsuspecting public. The publisher is dropping the new book. Meaning the publisher is adding the book to its catalog.

Confusing. Still, I dropped acid, she dropped her boyfriend, drop a dime (giving information to the police) is still in current use.

Editor's note: The long out of print paperback "To Drop a dime" is the classic book on organized crime in New Jersey.

Oh what should I do with my supermarket cart

There is an etiquette to supermarket carts. Certainly if you shop at one of those European stores that use the quarter in the slot procedure, you retrieve your cart with your quarter and return it to the line of carts to get your quarter back. Nobody wants to give a quarter to the supermarket. Even a lawyer who gets a thousand dollars for billable hours will march the cart back to the store to get his quarter.

I usually go to the more laissez faire suburban supermarkets where the customer has discretion as to where he deposits his cart. Here there is a choice of being super nice and marching the cart to the front of the store and add it to the line of carts already there. Another option, when where there is a corral for supermarket carts in the parking lot, is to add the cart to this group. I like to stand five feet away and propel my cart into the group, creating some excitement for my day.

When it is convenient, or I have time on my hands, or perhaps am looking for some exercise, I will be a nice guy and return them to the proper places. But sometimes I am lazy, or I am late for something, or it is raining. Then I face the moral dilemma of how to handle the now empty cart.

The morally repugnant thing would be to deposit it in the driving lane. However, if there are lots of empty spaces I might deposit the cart in a parking space, ideally a space empty of cars but that already has a cart or two. In effect I am not ruining a parking space but am using a parking space that is already ruined.

Of course there is the old lift half of the cart on the grass and leave the other half of the cart in the front end of a space maneuver. The space is still usable, although now it is perhaps not an ideal parking choice. This is a morally ambiguous choice, similar perhaps to that of a devout Catholic who votes for a pro abortion candidate. It will not extend one's time in purgatory, but may result in being placed in a harder chair.

Editor's note: Those marked off queuing areas where you can put your cart at the entrance of the parking lot is called a cart corral. I learned that today with the help of Google.

Thoughts on Mad Men

Thanks to Netflix, I have finally watched all of the episodes of Mad Men. I didn't start watching the original show until around the fifth season, and by the that time it was in it's second and less illustrious path. It's a great show, part historic documentary of the advertising agency in its classic period, part social history, and part telenovela.

Here are some random thoughts on Mad Men.

1) It must be great working in an office with that much booze. Instead of coffee breaks the workers apparently got Scotch breaks.
2) Women are there for the pleasure of the men. They get coffee, handle personal errands and are there for erotic purposes when the need arises. A happier time.
3) It could be  a stressful. A random decision from a client could kill one's career.
4) Thanks to the poetry of Don Draper pitching a campaign, the American dream of prosperity through buying things almost looks like a noble cause.
5)Those long hairs and beards ruined a good thing.
6) Women slowly learned to get what was theirs, and not just by the capricious decisions of men.
7) Whenever a new company tries to buy the firm, the staff realizes that "better the devil you know" is a prudent policy.
8) The show is primarily a workplace show and wives, girlfriends, and children are distractions in search of the perfect ad campaign.
9)The most important relationship in the show is between Don and Peggy, who both knew that work and advertising was the heartbeat of life.
10) Robert Morse was always a treat in the show. Makes you want to view the movie "How to Succeed in Business without really trying". Loved when he sang a song after he died. Loved the way he made everyone take off their shoes before entering his office. Now that was power. Still he was a better boss than anyone else. "Better the devil you know".
11) High class restaurants in New York were boring.

Editor's note: The one bad thing about viewing the show on Netflix instead of the original tv series is you miss the commercials. Commercials on Mad Men were like the ones on the Superbowl. The ad agencies used it to show off their best stuff.
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D Day

I think it's time to retire D Day. The day will always be there but now that we have reached the 75th I think it's time to retire the ritual of world leaders, who don't really like each other, to have to pose together in France for a picture. Sometimes I think they do it to embarrass we Americans who had the temerity to select such a silly person as president.

the kids on Better Things

I love Better Things. I watch it religiously when it's on and often watch the instant rerun that follows it to catch the nuances that I may have missed the first time around. I have often said that most of my experiences of family life comes from watching television situation comedies. In turn, most of what I know about raising daughters comes from watching Better Things.

Lately there has been some negative buzz about the show. It revolves around the behavior of the older girls. Do all American teenagers act like Max and Frankie? Granted, most middle class American girls are privileged, demanding, and view their parents as walking credit cards.  Such is life. Still, I predict that, although annoying as youth, they will succeed in the game of life.
My predictions for the girls:

Max is pretty and knows how to manipulate people to get money. She will do fine in life, she'll end up getting occasional roles and will  couch surf from upscale Hollywood apartments to mansions in the Valley with various male directors and producers.

Frankie will end up becoming a doctor. I suspect she is good at math. She has the personality of someone who is good at math. She will get a good job in a hospital but will not be known for her bedside manner.

Duke will get married and live in the suburbs of LA. She will be the one to cajole her sisters into visiting Mom for Mother's Day. She will be the only one of the girls to visit Grandma in the nursing home. When Grandma dies the two older sisters will turn up, demanding their share.

Taking the senior bus to Atlantic City

The mandatory activity for the retiree in New Jersey is the experience of taking the senior bus to Atlantic City. Like the trip to Florida during spring break for college students, all seniors are required, by law, to do this pilgrimage at least once a year.

Apparently you have to buy the tickets in advance and on the big day show up at 8:30 at the local senior center ready for bear and the expectation of a rewarding and lucrative day in Atlantic City.

Today the big day is here. Looks like it is going to be cool and damp, no sunshine. Oh well. Got on the bus. No problem. Nice ride. Always fun to see the windmills of old Atlantic City. Back in the day you were greeted at the casino with a roll of quarters. Now it's high tech. Fortunately I was able to find an old Resorts card and it was able to take in the credit for twenty five dollars.

Resorts is nice. Cozy, a little old fashioned, I was reminded how, as a tot, I vacationed with my parents there when it was the old Chalfonte Haddon Hall. There were no televisions in the rooms. You had to go to one of the television parlors, each named for a network. In the NBC room I sang along with my parents and other guests to Sing-a-Long with Mitch.

I digress. My partner and I went to the slots machines. I played on the bus money. Every once in a while there would be fireworks and the machine would explode in sounds as it went into the bonus round. After all the excitement I realized I had won a few dollars.

Walked over to the Hard Rock Cafe. Very modern decor, had an overpriced burger. Slots again. Lost money. Had a free drink from the roving waitress. Yes I know you are supposed to tip them.

Finally we went home, a little lighter in net worth, if not in pounds.
Okay, no big deal. Last time I took the bus to AC we got donuts in the morning, bingo during the ride, and a movie on the way home. Oh well, I'll always have my memories of bus rides past.

Happy Mothers Day

Just got back from lovely Singapore. Hot and humid but fun. Especially liked the hawker centers for food. Being lazy I can't think of anything new to say for Mother's Day but here are two old favorites.

Editor's note: Selling like hotcakes but now available for the low price of $2.99 my book.

John Bercow

https://twitter.com/tagesschau/status/1085610253922828289

Those of us in America, when bored with our own political crises, like to turn to our friends in Britain and watch  theirs. Quickly becoming an American celebrity and symbol of jolly olde England is the Speaker of the House of Commons, John Bercow.

Watching the Brexit news on Youtube, I have become fascinated with the wit and calls to order of Mr. Bercow. Apparently a Conservative, he likes scolding members of Parliament of all persuasions when they are getting too noisy. I'd like to see a debate between him and Nancy Pelosi. I'd also like to know where he gets his haircuts.

Side hustles

When I was in college I was friends with a young woman who had side hustles. When she came to college two weeks late she explained that she was hustling up her tuition. "A hustle here, a hustle there and now I have tuition". Later I figured out that selling my radio was one of her side hustles.

One of the classic side hustles is selling stuff on e bay. People do make money doing it if they have the time and inherited neat stuff. Other side hustles involve selling birthday cakes to the neighbors, helping your brother with his contracting business on weekends, or for those with literary aspirations, writing a Kindle book.

Alexandria Octavio-Cortez has stated that side hustles move up the unemployment rate, but that is factually inaccurate. Having a side hustle does, however, give you a varied and potentially lucrative second life. Side hustles are also useful if you want to get out of things. "I'm sorry I can't teach Sunday school but I  reserve Sundays for my side hustle."

Cell phones have replaced cigarettes

Back in the day, idle moments at the bar, when you didn't care for the hockey game on the television, could be filled by lighting up a cigarette. Awkward moments, waiting for the train, waiting to be called by the doctor, on long elevator rides, were filled by smoking.

Today you can't smoke at any of these places. Luckily, the cell phone has come along. It occupies your hands, let's you avoid staring into space or at the other idlers, and makes it looks like you have a life.

"See, that man must be texting his girlfriend" people will think.

"He must have important business to attend to at work. Perhaps that is his agent who wants revisions on his novel", people will think.

Little do they know that you have no new mail, and are looking at a cat video on Facebook. Modern times.

These modern technologies

In days of old when knights were bold and HDMI weren't invented
You could plug the RCA plug into the tv and connect it to your amplifier and lousy tv speaker sound prevented...
I thought I would do that when I got my Samsung smart tv but I found out that was not possible. My amplifier, bought in the early aughts had no usb not to even think of HDMI jacks. It was analog, going back to a day when toilets apparently weren't invented.

Everybody said that's easy. You have to buy a digital sound bar. That's true, but I they're expensive! I guess I inherited my cheapness genes. The past year I learned to live with the flat sounding television speakers. For cable I could plug my RCA plugs into the cable box but for Netflix and Youtube I had to learn to live with the television speakers.

Last week I finally took a chance on what was called a digital to analog converter. It was about twenty bucks on the Internet. I was expecting a usb plug. Instead it came with weird plugs I later found out were HDMI plugs. After getting out my flashlight and magnifiying glass I located a previously unseen HDMI port on the back of the tv. I plugged everthing in. Surprisingly, after some tinkering, I got the thing to work. Now my old speakers can play my Netflix and You Tube feeds. Sound isn't bad. After 60 you can't hear higher frequencies anyway.

Editor's note: Sometimes I wonder if companies really want to improve our listening experiences or they just want to sell us more stuff.

Britain and America arm in arm

For some reason America and the UK  will always be joined at the hip. Both countries are going through their first crisis of the 21st century together. Soon, Englishmen won't be able to get hands on their prescriptions, there will be traffic jams miles long in Dover and no-one will be able to fly a plane to Europe or even Ireland.

In America, no-one will be able to fly a plane at all. There will be no traffic controllers, luggage snifters, Food stamps, or national parks. In England no-one will be able to go from Belfast to Dublin.
Both countries will face the future alone.

My prediction is that once the W2 forms will have been distributed, they'll find a way for us to pay our taxes. The English will be able to travel anywhere they want, but it will be more expensive. Like the gas lines of 1975 the solution will be reached but it will cost more in the pocketbook.

Editor's note: Looks like the next government shutdown has been diverted. It's exciting now that we are living in a national emergency. Things feels so different.

Retirement

It happened so quickly, I'm retired. There are rules to being a new retiree that I am learning. Here are some of them:

1) Have spare money. Don't expect all the money you are owed from work will be given to you right away.

2) For men the rules are different than women. Women are expected to immediately go into care giver mode when they retire. "I'm so happy you retired, Mom. Now I can get rid of that baby sitter and take Egon out of day care. Aunt Bertha will be so happy to see you every week and I need you to help with the Valentine's party. Now you have no excuses!"  Men are only expected to visit relatives on holidays and thankfully that does not change with retirement. 

3) Have a story and stick to it. Whether you plan to play golf or fish every day, visit the family, or finally start an organic garden. People will be very insistent on knowing what you are planning to do. Netflix is not an option. For me, I've been telling everybody I plan to write a book. 

4) Don't expect to suddenly be popular. If anything people will avoid you now since they assume you are a malingerer with too much time on your hands. 

5) Retirement is expensive. When you are at work, except for the occasional temptation of the vending machines, you are quarantined from spending serious money. As a retiree, lunch at the diner, the afternoon at Target, the movies,  and the early evening at the bar can get expensive. Ditto the weekly visit to the casinos.

I'm sure there are other things on the happy road to obsolescence. I'll keep you posted. I don't have an excuse now. 

Facebook and the grim reaper

I guess it has happened to all of us. We wish someone a happy birthday on Facebook then get a message from someone else saying such and such died. We go to our high school reunion site and find out our biology professor died. 

Yesterday I went onto Facebook and saw someone had created a celestial tribute to somebody. She had a whole website with pictures and anecdotes. Apparently she died. 

In some ways it's good. Instead of wondering "what ever happened to... " an old classmate we get a cleaned up version of their lives. Their cute wives, their cute kids, their expensive vacations and at the end of life their passing from this earth. 

My mother said when she got older her main social life consisted of going to wakes and funerals. She said she had become selective about who would and wouldn't get to see her in a black dress. It became hard to go to two funerals in a month when the dress may still be in the cleaners from the last funeral.

Now we can sit at home and mourn the dead on Facebook. It does save on dry cleaning bills. 

Predictions for 2019

I'm old enough to remember New Year's Eve as the time Louis Rukeyser and his guests would sit around in tuxedos and predict the stock market for the year. One guest would be lauded as having been right and the others would be scolded for being oh so wrong.

This year I am a bit proud of myself for coming right close to predicting the close on the Dow and S and P indexes. I predicted the Dow would close at 23000 and it closed at 23327. I predicted the S and P would close at 2450 and it closed at 2507. I was overly optimistic on the NASDAQ, predicting 6800 when in fact it closed at 6635. I prontificated Microsoft to be selling at 70 when it is in fact now selling at 101.57. I was also wrong on oil prices, now selling for 45.81 instead of my inflated 80.

The Eagles are going to the playoffs, (I was right) . I predict they will lose before the Superbowl at the end of this month. Next year they will not be "in the hunt". Interest rates will go up, but not by much. My big prediction is that Mike Pence will be our president this time next year. The Donald will announce his resignation on Twitter. Americans will again be selling cherries and soybeans to China. Actually I am mildly bullish on the new year.


    Entity:                Today:               December 31, 2019:

Dow Jones               23327               26000
S and P                      2507                2900
NAS                          6635                7000
Oil                              45.81              70
Unemployed               4.1%               4.5%
Microsoft                  101.57             120

Editor's note: I own stock in Microsoft.