Saturday, June 6, 2009

Why I travel

This is actually a good time to travel. Airfares are low and most people are staying home, watching hulu on the Internet. People often ask why I travel and the real reason is not philosophical or to see life in a new way. You can do that at the Shop-Rite. The reason I travel is to have things to talk about at parties.

When you have children you automatically have things to talk about in social situations.

"So how is Mary doing at soccer?

"Well that damn coach changed the rules on her."

"So what college is Johnnie looking at?"

"Well he's leaning towards Bucknell but we're using Villanova as a safety school."

We all know that the reason people have children is so they have things to talk about at parties.

People who don't have progeny often try to talk about their golf game but that bores non golfers. You can talk about your job if you are a production assistant in a hit series but most jobs are dull to have and duller to talk about.

Travel, on the other hand, is a reliable way to fill in conversational lags at parties. You can talk about travel bargains in Mexico, rude hotel clerks in Turkey, dirty bathrooms in France, late trains in Italy. Travel provides many opportunities for witty and interesting anecdotes. That's why I travel. The only thing that is a conversation killer is cruises. Nobody cares what they served at the buffet on your last cruise.

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