Sunday, February 14, 2010

Another solution to the economic malaise

One of the problems with being over fifty is that you are too old to be marketable but too young to retire. I propose to change that. I would lower the age at which you would receive Social Security to fifty. And for those of us who have aches and pains in the morning I would decree that all you would have to do is send in a post card checking off your ailments (aches and pains, cholesterol, high blood pressure) and you would be immediately eligible for Social Security Disability.

America would become like France. The coffee houses would be full during the morning. The bars would be filled from noon onto the evening. We would all be happy and fulfilled in our lives. Doctors and rehab in the morning. Whiskey and beer in the afternoon. Hotels would be at capacity. Casinos and racetracks would be full of business. Restaurants would be busy. There would be a ready pool for volunteer positions. Unemployment would be below 5 per cent.

What this country needs in new ideas. To heck with the deficit.

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